Tag Archives: Obama

Yet Another Award for Obama!

Oooh, shiny

Oooh, shiny

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A befuddled President Barack Obama was awakened at the crack of noon Monday to more unexpected accolades: He had just won the Most Valuable President (MVP) award for keeping the world turning on its axis, simply by using the power of his enormous brain.

Although the President was difficult to understand before his first cup of coffee and slightly miffed at being roused so early from his bed (well, who among us is really a morning person?), it seemed that, after the disbelief had worn off, he was fully cognizant of the honor and responsibility of being America’s MVP. “Wow,” he exclaimed. “You mean just by thinking about what I’m going to have for lunch, I’m actually powering the rotation of the earth? Far fucking out!”  The POTUS was quickly rushed to his bubble bath by the First Lady, as Robert Gibbs, Presidential spokesperson, furiously typed the words “Thank you very much for this unexpected and overwhelming honor” into the Presidential Teleprompter for Obama to read later on in the afternoon.

Unfortunately, not everyone is thrilled with this year’s recipient of the MVP Award. Scientists, in particular, are outraged at the counterfactual assertions of the MVP Committee.  Said Janet Marksham of the League of Concerned Scientists, “We have, in fact, measured the size of President Obama’s brain, and have found that it is exactly the same size as every other adult male of the species Homo sapiens. In fact, there appears to be no evidence that Obama’s thoughts are powering anything, much less the rotation of the earth!”

Despite the clearly partisan naysayers, America should be very proud of our President becoming the world’s first black MVP.  The prize is $10 million, which President Obama is donating to the newly-founded charity, the Malia and Sasha College Fund for Underprivileged Daughters of American Presidents.

—Additional Reporting by S.N. Ark


A Sunday Morning Rant

(Note: Apologies for my absence…I’ve been over at The Widdershins.)

The Blogosphere The Blogosphere

I’m still processing what I experienced on Friday night at The White House Project. It was quite exciting to be around those 100 women who are considering running for office, to hear the passion, trepidation and hope in their voices. It was also a privilege to hear the wise words of the women who have been successful (and who have failed) in the brutal world of politics. I got a good “get” from the event, too: I will have an interview with a fantastic lady,  New York State Senator Liz Krueger for you in a few weeks, as well. Teh kewl!

I’m also processing my thoughts about blogging, the Interwebs, and what they’re really good for. Seems to me, the best thing we do is opinionating, and organizing for action. We’re trying to do a little of both here at TW now, because my opinions are a little dark these days, and I’m having a really hard time trying to keep a positive attitude with all the idiocy that’s going on.

I mean, what planet was the Nobel Peace Prize Committee on? Even the Obama-supporting pundits I’m reading are having a hard time defending the complete clusterfuckiness of that award. Some, like Glenn Greenwald, are not defending it at all; others seem to be resorting to the tried-and-true tactic of skimming over the obvious ridiculousness of it all, blaming the Republicans and, in the case of the DNC, calling those who criticize the award “siding with terrorists.” (I have to admit, I find that “reporter’s” assertion that Ronald Reagan, Mr. Iran-Contra, should have gotten the award, to be quite hilarious.)

Although I sometimes can chuckle at the absurdity of things, in general, I find I have lost my sense of humor. Obama seems bound and determined to make sure that nothing benefiting the needy ever passes through Congress, all the while (successfully?) blaming the Party who is out of power and who literally can do NOTHING to prevent him from doing anything he wants to do. It is really fucking depressing, and the idea that a Republican President and Congress might be taking over again in four years hardly seems bearable, or a remotely desired outcome.

So, the last thing I want to hear right now is the smug cluckings and crowings of the Right, as Obama swiftly throws any chance of real change out the window with both hands. I’ve had to put up with those jackasses and their lying, criminal, anti-American activities for the past eight years. I don’t want to hear what they have to say, not now, not ever. I will never forgive them for Bush, for the Iraq and Afghanistan wars, for the destruction of the Constitution and the economy, and most of all, for being in bed with the corporations who have ruined a far-from-perfect, but well-meaning attempt at democracy, and who have now taken over the Democratic Party leadership as well. If I have been oversensitive about that because of my red-hot hatred towards these bloviating gasbags, I do apologize.

Continue reading


Typical Obamaganda

Typical Obamaganda

During the primaries, the Obots followed a distinct pattern whenever Obama did something they didn’t like. The tactic was so prevalent that I actually coined an anagram for it:  IACF! (It’s All Clinton’s Fault!)

A classic example of IACF! was when Obama said he’d filibuster telecom/Bushie immunity for warrantless wiretapping, then turned right around and not only didn’t filibuster, but actually voted FOR the immunity. Meanwhile, Hillary kept her promise and voted against the immunity.

Whose fault was it? Was it Obama’s for not keeping his promise? Of COURSE not. It was Hillary’s fault for showing him up! And remember the Reverend Wright brouhaha? Josh Marshall said that he was Hillary’s fault too.

If Obama’s the nominee, we will see no end of this kind of stuff. And there’s probably some small benefit of getting a preview. But the simple fact is that we wouldn’t be seeing this stuff now if it weren’t for the fact that this is the kind of campaign Hillary Clinton’s campaign has decided to wage — often directly and at other times indirectly by not reining it in in her supporters when it crops up on its own. Wright is news today because Ferraro’s been news yesterday. Are her comments racist? That’s a loaded, too copious, word. And there’ve been cases where the Clinton team has gotten a bum rap on these matters. What I do know, however, is that Clinton’s campaign and her surrogates have injected the subject of Obama’s race into this campaign too many times now for it to be credible to believe that it is anything but a conscious strategy.

Of course, Josh, of course. Hillary waved her magic wand and forced Obama to sit in that church for 20 years. Mein Gott, the incredible power she has over Barack Obama! I mean, if she had that much control over what Obama did, don’tcha think she woulda waved that wand and made sure he didn’t run at all? Hellllooooooo, as Naomi “Christmas, Hanukkah and New Year’s” Wolf would say!

But Obot delusions aside, if you were under the impression that IACF! was going to cease now that we have the most post-racial, unifyingest, Pony-est Preznit evah, think again! It’s just mutated into a different form: INOF! (It’s Never Obama’s Fault!)

Continue reading

How Did I Miss This? Sorry, Ladies: Bush’s “Conscience Rule” Will Not Be Overturned

Image Credit: SwanSpirit

Image Credit: SwanSpirit

Not now, not ever.

I’m so done with this President. I’m so done with NOW and NARAL and Planned Parenthood and Ms. Magazine, who pretended Barack Obama was a feminist superhero. Even Hillary Clinton, in her forced-reconciliation tour-de-bullshit before the election, emphasized Iraq and the economy as reasons to vote for Obama. She never claimed that he’d be the male version of Bella Abzug, Gloria Steinem and Elizabeth Cady Stanton combined. I assume those were words that neither Party loyalty nor political self-interest could force the core of her being to choke out.

As I wrote in March, the HHS regulation Bush forced through in the waning days of his Administration like a cold butter knife through a hot thick steak, has already made a demonstrable negative impact on women’s lives. As per their usual practice, the wingnuts have been screaming bloody murder about Obama appointing “pro-abortion” (GACK! Toxic Meme Alert!) Democratic Kansas governor Kathleen Sebelius to be his HHS Secretary.

Since Obama announced his nomination of Sebelius to head the HHS department in March, pro-lifers have been making efforts to block her confirmation. They cite Sebelius’ pro-abortion actions and her personal ties to the notorious late-term abortionist George Tiller.

Well, it looks like the right-wing hysteria was all for naught.

“I can tell you right now that the President supports and I support a clearly defined conscience clause for providers and institutions. I always have. It’s been in place in Kansas the entire time I’ve been in elected office,” Sebelius said at the hearing. “I know there was some concern about the regulation that was proposed and implemented at the very end of the previous administration that it was overly broad and frankly overly vague. So I don’t think from the discussions that I’ve had that there is any intention of interfering with the underlying legal basis.” 

The hearing comes on the heels of Sebelius’s recent singing (sic, although I like the idea of singing bills into law!) into law a piece of anti-choice legislation that will require women seeking abortions to be given the option of getting an ultrasound or hearing the fetus’ heartbeat. The law also puts state funds toward producing literature and a video on abortion. Sebelius vetoed a similar bill a year ago; it seems likely that she signed this one to avoid an dust-up with anti-choicers just moments before her confirmation hearings.  Her approval of this bill, in conjunction with her comments about the HHS rule, raise questions about exactly how pro-choice Sebelius is and whether she’ll prioritize health care reform over reproductive rights — a question the reproductive health community had for previous nominee Sen. Tom Daschle, too.

Continue reading

Obama Wants Gitmo “Mini-Me”

And I Will Call Him...Mini-Gitmo!

And I Will Call Him...Mini-Gitmo!

Continuing his bizarre morphing into Dr. Evil, President Barack Obama has apparently decided that one Guantanamo Bay isn’t enough. He wants another one – a Gitmo “Mini-Me;” a kinder, more Barackian place where he can continue the military tribunals, dispense with habeas corpus and due process, and hold “suspected terrorists” without a trial for an indefinite length of time.

I found this little gem tucked away inside Rick Klein’s article in The Note (linked to by Gary in today’s Morning Widdershins), whch details the many ways in which Obama has been leaving the Left Behind:

And can the administration wedge this one past the left? “The Obama administration is weighing plans to detain some terror suspects on U.S. soil — indefinitely and without trial — as part of a plan to retool military commission trials that were conducted for prisoners held in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba,” Evan Perez writes in The Wall Street Journal. “The proposal being floated with members of Congress is another indication of President Barack Obama’s struggles to establish his counter-terrorism policies, balancing security concerns against attempts to alter Bush-administration practices he has harshly criticized.

Okay, Obots, defend this one. I. DARE. YOU.

Continue reading

Drama at the G20

Protesters at the G20

Protesters at the G20

Well, it’s the first day of the G20 Summit in Great Britain. My teevee this morning showed me a picture of Our Girl sitting right next to President Obama in one of his morning meetings.  My suggestion to Barack?

Step 1: Replace your TelePrompTer with an earpiece.
Step 2: Have Hillary speak into it.
Step 3: Repeat everything she says.

My guess is, the press would find that you’d suddenly “recovered” your “natural speaking ability.” Cough! Cough!

As shown in the picture above, there are thousands of protesters who are just as mad as we are in America about the widening gap between rich and poor, and the horrible mess the global corporate overlords have made of their country. And French President Sarkozy is threatening to walk if they don’t do what he wants and start strictly regulating international transactions.

Should be an interesting day.

This is an open thread – tawk amongst yuhselves!

A Little Snark…

Laughter is good for the soul

Laughter is good for the soul

goes a long way. This is, perhaps, the funniest thing I have seen in a very long time.

(Warning before you click: NOT SAFE FOR WORK)

Head O State

If you are tempted to buy this product, I would be careful. Like its inspiration, it will most likely overpromise and underdeliver.

More snark to come later on today, with a playlet about Hillary’s confirmation hearings…and if you missed us last night on The View From Under The Bus, you can listen to it here!